Monday, October 28, 2013

HANAH

     Hanah does not call. She does not e-mail or Skype or tweet "or nothin'". I send her my own heartfelt e-mails, gift cards to Safeway and pictures and videos of cats being cute and funny, but she does not respond. Somewhere, she, probably, laughs over those pictures and videos, but it's like there is a wall between us.
     In the movie Fireproof that I recently told you about, the main character, encouraged by his father, starts working on a relationship with his wife. Every time he talks to his mother, though, he gets irrationally cross with her, feeling that she nags him unnecessarily. I didn't hear any nagging! She would ask him how things were going and, maybe, a few details, and he would start getting edgy and abrasive toward her. In my heart I wailed: "Why do they do this to us?" - I meant children to parents - "We just want to have something in common with them, some connection!" This thing with Hanah stays in the back of my mind, because, what can I do about it that I'm already not doing? But - it's a live sore in my heart. 
     At the end of Fireproof, the main character realized that, it was his mother who instigated the process by which he was able to win his wife back and find God. He went to her then, hugged her and asked for forgiveness. I was crying at that moment, even though that's not really what the movie was about. Or, perhaps, it was the main point: the most essential changes in our lives come when we find a connection with our parents, and, most of all: our Heavenly Parent!

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