Sunday, October 13, 2013


Make me a rainbow,
To breach old and new, Father,
Make me a gateway
For many to come through, Father,
You are a sunlight in a very dark land,
Make me a prism held in your hand,

You are the music,
Won't you make me a lyre?
I am a kindling, Father, 
Make me a fire!
Our voices blend now in a one loving song
The dream comes through now, beautiful, strong!

Today we sang this song at the church service. I remember when I first time heard it, more than 30 years ago. Among other young and the older and the old people at that workshop I was, probably, the happiest. My dearest wish to find friends in this new land came true, and I was on my way to know more about God and religion. You know how it is with the new converts: they tend to idealize their newly found beliefs and movements. I wish I could get back to that innocent time, to recapture the freshness of my perception but to stay away from swallowing everything that was said to me without questioning it. Is it even possible? Sometimes I think that it is I who was a fool for trusting so readily in those first days and months of my acquaintance with the Unification Movement. 
     It would be so much easier if I could just ignore the facts and still feel gung ho about living for the sake of that church. In the past few years I seem to cut things and people who betray me off almost without the backward look. It is almost true. I usually cool down in a little while and give them another chance. Will that happen after that retreat that I was invited to for the next Saturday? I was determined not to go, especially, when I heard that they will discuss the directions from Mrs. Moon there. Getting invited by one friend after another changed my mind. Perhaps, if the above mentioned Mrs. Moon's directions will come up, I will go for a walk. Perhaps, I will even have some company of those who also are not interested to be involved in that kind of discussion!

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