OK, I know, I didn't write for two days. I've been doing something very important. I watched Seventeen Instances of Spring (it should be Moments, not Instances; I don't know, who translates those things)! Its an old Russian mini-series from the seventies about a high placed Soviet spy in Hitler's command at the very end of the WWII. Its very good, because there are a lot of great historical references and exciting plot twists. One problem was, I have to remember that I am on the American side now, at least when it comes to the communist expansion to the West. One of the most important points in that movie was the negotiations between Himmler's emissary, Karl Wolf, and the U.S. They tried to exclude the Soviet Union from these meetings, even though they were allies, because they were interested in stopping it (Soviet Union) from taking a foothold in Europe. The Russian spy successfully interrupted the negotiations, and the Soviets took a large part of Europe for themselves.
I was also often wondering during the movie, what were the German people thinking at that time, at the end of the war? After all the hype of Nazi Germany starting it's bid for the world domination and the excitement of the first victories, now they came to the part when the Karma or history itself bounced back at them. Did they tremble in trepidation of the imminent payback for their monstrous treatment of the fellow humans? Did they just shrug their shoulders at the injustice of fate? What went through their minds, as, for the second time in half a century, they prepared for the starvation and other deprivation to take hold of their country? It took an awful lot of them to put Hitler and the Nazis in power. They did it. They couldn't blame someone else for what was coming. I feel a little akin to them right now.
You, probably, didn't expect that. Really, what do I, a Jewish woman, have in common with the German people of nineteen forties, the majority of whom followed and cheered the Nazis? Exactly that: the following and cheering. Of course, I am not totally sure that I am right in thinking that the Unification Church used me and thousands more it's members for the enrichment and an ego-trip of a few individuals. I could be mistaken and weak in my faith. Or not. But, the point is, I can't help but ask a question: "Why did I chose to follow, when I already had my doubts?" How do I reconcile my and my family's future and the past?