Tuesday, December 10, 2013


     I had in mind a very different day than the one that happened in reality!
  A week and a half ago, when I saw Mp. P., he gave me a few sheets of paper with a psychiatric test. I was supposed to bring it back at my next appointment time. I finished the test, but, of course, forgot to bring it to him. I told him at our session that I will bring it that same evening, but when I got home, Roberta wanted attention (and rightfully so), Sonny needed to be picked up at the Subway station, Taka needed his dinner, and so forth...
     I forgot all about my promise. Mr. P. texted me over the weekend and asked, whether I can take the test to him today, on Monday. You bet your sweet patootie that I decided to do my best to do so!
     So, this morning I ignored my aching bones and scratchy throat. I got dressed, prodded Sonny to hurry it up and get ready for school on time and took him to Subway (we call it BART in this area). Then I drove to meet Mr. P. 
      I don't know if it has anything to do with the therapy that I undergo with Mr. P., but these last few weeks I'm experiencing all these funny bodily symptoms! First, I had that painful feeling in my chest when I realized that I need to do something different in my relationship with Taka. Second... I don't even want to tell you all, what's been going on with my body! It's trying to convey something to me, but I can't be sure, whether it's good or bad. 
     Before I met with Mr. P. today, I decided to go grocery shopping in a small store near the cafe where he would be waiting for me. As soon as I got there, I began having strong pain in my belly. I knew that I have only a short time to get to the bathroom before it would be too late! You should've seen me zig-zagging through the aisles, passing perplexed shoppers, pushing their carts away on my way to a ladies' room. Let's just say, I was almost on time. Gross? Not as gross and confused as I felt! The ladies' room didn't have any paper towels but, at least, it was mostly clean and had some good smelling soap. I had to make do with what I had and get clean. I thought of forgetting my appointment and going home to a shower and a cup of warm tea to sooth my frayed ego, but that would have meant a defeat. 
     When I got to the cafe, Mr. P. had an appointment with another person. Of course, he only wanted the test results back! What was so important about it, I don't know. Suffice it to say, my ego needed much more comfort today than a singular cup of tea!
     Why am I telling you this? Isn't it - TMI - Too Much Information? It, probably, is, but I want to let you know that, like ice on a river at springtime, something in my psyche is moving toward the resolution of my many problems. Like ice on a river, sometimes it's not pretty to watch and can mean a calamity, but there's no way around it, it has to happen!

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