and started our family life in 1991. Taka is a very capable and persistent individual. He finished a computer school in Japan, but worked some blue color jobs here in the U.S. until about 1989, when he was asked to set up and run the computer system at a Wholesale Seafood Company. He did just that, almost killing himself in the process, working 12 - 14 hour shifts 6 days a week without any help.
In 1992 he found a better job. By that time I was pregnant with Hanah. We were quite happy on his starting salary of $42,000! Since then, - the more money Taka earns, - the more we feel like we are very poor.
You see how easy it is for me to talk about Taka and the money that he makes? It's because for the longest time it seemed that he only was concerned about money. To make sure, I knew perfectly well that he wanted closeness and warmth and home, but with the way things were between us, he wasn't getting those things. So, it was very easy for him to beat at one and the same point: MONEY; it was also the easiest for me to put thoughts of getting closer to him or building a good relationship out of my mind and concentrate on surviving day after day.
Taka has a family (his parents and siblings with their own families) in Japan.
That's another thing that we have to overcome: his lack of desire to discuss anything with me, like why his parents wouldn't communicate with us for many years now. Since his father got sick with cancer (he's alright now), he showed some interest in coming to the U.S. with a visit.
Taka is tall, slender and handsome. I am very lucky to have such a husband. I am very lucky to have such a husband, I am very lucky...
All these years I failed to teach him the necessity of being kind. Oh, he is a very good guy, but it's hard for him to show his soft side to us, the family. He can yell and lecture Sonny for two hours without feeling bad about it (I get conscience pangs right away if I yell at one of my kids or Taka). If he feels any remorse afterwords, he gives money to a person that he offended. I hope that when he is ninety years old and poor he won't be sorry for teaching kids to expect only money from him!