Taka stepped on something, teetered in place and then righted himself. I looked down: it was a small jar of my medicine that
got under his foot. Another one was also lying on the rug of our living room in front of the TV. I pointed at them and asked: "Could you pick them up?" Taka glanced down as well: "Wha-a-t?!"
It is such a usual thing: him finding something on the floor, sometimes, even asking: "What is it doing on the floor?" - and then walking right pass it without stooping to pick a thing up. Is it normal? Do other busy husbands do the same things to avoid taking responsibility for the aspects of life that they consider the wife's business?
Is it normal? To me - it's just wild! We are supposed to be one flesh and blood, mates forever, the most intimate close ones that there can be! How is it that husbands commonly treat wives like they are nothing, like it's OK to speak a rude word to or neglect her because he works so hard and is soooo stressed. In the not so distant past women would let husbands beat them to relieve the stress. They, probably, still do it!
I used to be of an opinion that the Stepford Wives' story
couldn't have happened, because some men in that town would've refused to sacrifice their wives for a desired imaginary haven of a home-life. After staying married to my husband I began to think that even the most idealistic and principled of the men might exchange the uncertainty of an emotional life with their human spouse for the comfort and predictability of robot's care. Do you think it's not so?
Park recently tried to ply on us horse chestnuts that he took for the edible ones. When it became apparent that he was mistaken, he immediately banged the door of his and Roberta's room shut, and I heard him start yelling at her: "You told me that they were chestnuts and that you ate them!" Roberta's whiny response followed and then some more of Park's garbled English. Today I asked her about that interchange, and she was almost in tears. "I just want him to go, but he stays put!"
"If you don't want to be treated like a doormat, get off the floor!" It's easy to say, yet hard to follow. Women are habitually taught to let a man have the last word, to take everything that he dishes out and swallow it with a smile.
In fact, I would give my right hand in order to be that kind of a woman! If only I could be a smiling idiot who denies her own self for the sake of the peace in the house!
Just now Taka said to me: "How come the camera is on the floor?" - and went on his merry way. I laughed. And picked up the camera myself.