The song that moved me to write this is called... I can't even easily translate that! The White Bath - it's the closest, I think. He talks about the sauna-like bath, with steam and birch twigs tied together to whip your body softly to encourage good circulation. You see, I am further now from the real reason, why that song tears at my heart so much!
A man who asks the caretaker to prepare him a bath like that is, obviously, someone who just left the Soviet forced labor camp. He says: "For my unconditional faith, how many years have I been in that "heaven"? I exchanged my limitless stupidity for this hopeless life." I am translating it loosely, to make it more possible to understand: "While swallowing tears, we tattooed Stalin's profile on the left side of our chests, so that he would hear how our hearts were breaking!"
A thought struck me that chilled me to the bone. I haven't been betrayed like that man in a song. Or have I? Didn't I spend thirty years believing and trusting someone that now seems to be a con-man, at best? Didn't I many times lay my health, safety, the very heart of me - on the line for that man? Limitless stupidity? I don't know. Maybe it was. Maybe we still did something good for the world. Maybe it's still ahead of me.