In a conversation with Mr. P. I mentioned
1. How I am fed up with life knocking me down as soon as I try to get up and ...
2. How I was mad at my sponsor for taking one of my absolutely innocent, very positive expressions and giving me a scolding for it. All I said to her was: "Oh, yeah! I did it." She took it as a statement of disrespect! She is thirty years my junior, but feels free to correct me. If it was a real offence, I might not have minded so much.
Mr. P., OF COURSE, reminded me of my own propensity to interpret people's words and looks the way my weighty, guilty, touchy psyche chooses to understand it. So what if my sponsor, who, probably, didn't have the benefit of Mr. P.'s type of counselling, made a mistake? Whose future is at stake here? I should be more concerned about doing my part.
What is more important, is my frustration with life. I expect a good outcome after every effort and get a shock every time there is a problem.
Mr. P. addressed my expectations. What is the most important thing in my life? Is it losing weight? It is very significant, yes, but the main reason, why I need to do it, is my desire to live a better life. I want to be of more assistance not only to my own family, but also to others. Because of the connection with and the love I have for God, I want to be able to spread a little of that love to the world.
So easily I forget the message of Paul in Heb 12:1-3:
"1Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."
"Lay aside every encumbrance and the sin... run with endurance the race... for the joy set before Him, [He] endured the cross, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."
My focus should not be the satisfaction of losing weight or people's acceptance of me or even how smooth my road to recovery is. My focus should be bringing glory to God by obeying the necessary rules and reaching victory. And the joy?
"Lay your treasures in Heaven, for where your treasure is there your heart will be also."
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