Thursday, September 25, 2014

GO AHEAD, SHOOT! HEALTHIER ME.


Do you remember me writing about my friend from Russia? We met in the first grade and continued on being friends through the school years and after, - all the way until I immigrated from Russia. Recently we could write to each other again.
I mentioned in my e-mail to her that, I write this blog. She said, even though her English is very limited, she would try to read it.
I expected her to enjoy it or, at least, to be polite about it, but she shocked me by writing: "I read your blog for September. I am sorry, I didn't like it!"
A year ago I would've been crushed. I wasn't exactly overjoyed to hear such a thing now, but my, somewhat, recovered psyche allowed me to quickly digest her response and allow her to have her opinion without going to pieces about it.
I should not say that, actually. My psyche never was whole to begin with, so I can state instead that, for the first time in my life, I have enough self confidence to be secure, even in the face of rejection!
     The irony of the situation is: writing blog is one of the 
reasons, why my attitude is so different now! I think, I was always meant to become a writer; I love doing it and derive most pleasure from it!  
Changing my environment and allowing myself to absorb other truths, than the one that I've become enmeshed in, also helped. 
My friend is dear to me, although we both realize that, 
we know next to nothing about each other and have very little in common. She just came out and said that too! 
Should I love her less for it? She is one of the brightest spots in my life!
So, instead of taking offence, I replied to her: "Wow, you shoot from the hip! OK, if you didn't like it, you didn't like it!" And that was it! I hope, she will write to me again: she sounds like a very truthful and real person and seems to accept me for myself - just what I am missing in my life!


1 comment:

  1. You have very different mentalities now, she very different interests and concerns, and yet on the other limited language. Of course it was said dramatically, but you should not take it to heart. talk about something she understood more about her life. The psyche is changing over the years, you are no longer a girl. Do you remember the Russian people are more harsh in their judgments. L.

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