I have some trouble telling one day from another: I make same meals for the family, play same games online, say same things, get into the same arguments. 
Hanah came home in the Summer, spent a couple of weeks with us and went to study and work in... Moscow, Idaho! For those of you, who don't know, why this is significant, - I am from Moscow - Moscow in Russia! What an irony!
Sonny enrolled in the Spring semester in Arizona State University. He is supposed to go there in November, but spends his time trying to forget about it. He still doesn't know, where he'll live, for example. His dad hounds him to make plans day and night, but Sonny only digs deeper into his bed covers. If someone hounded me day and night, that's what I would do too. 
Taka works. Actually, a few weeks back he came to me and said, he wanted to retire. Knowing him, there must be a really strong reason for such a drastic thought, but the only thing I felt, was horror!
Every weekend that he spends home is a PTSD inducing experience for me. Imagine, if I'd have to endure it every day for the rest of our lives! Besides, he keeps telling me, we don't have enough money. How are we suppose to live on half of what we earn now?
What brings me down most of all, though, are not the children or Taka. I bring myself down. What kind of a person am I: don't write, don't read, can't change my harmful behavior. Life just doesn't seem to be worth living with my state of mind.
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